A girl trouble…

Sometimes i feel like i wasn’t born to be in this world. Like I’m some sort of alien.

I feel like I’m far away from home. Like I was left in a scary place full of selfish people. I mean, there is always this great never ending flow of love coming out of me but i don’t see it coming from other people. Well, I didn’t at least.

They don’t really love, and the few who have the guts to talk about it are most likely using that sacred word to manipulate people. It’s like: “I’m sorry that i didn’t let you go see that person. I did it because i love you.”

Well that kind of love I’ll have to pass, because I’m not only a lover, I’m a free man, and it’s up to me the choice to where the flow of love is going to come. Eventually i found someone. Someone really special that could really feel my love.

I could see her going trough all the things i went trough. Giving out all her sweet Beautiful love and getting nothing in return. Her love wasn’t for me, and i don’t think it will ever be, but that didn’t stop me from falling for her. I guess that’s a rule in love: you only fall for the person that is like you. She’s a jesus walking on the earth, with a heart full of love thinking that maybe once she loved it enough it would eventually love her back.

But that doesn't’t seem to be working for her or for me. I can’t avoid the love i feel for her, so eventually it just came out of me. Now she knows it, and it seem like she doesn’t feel the same for me, which is something that really break my heart. Sometmes e feel like she loves me, but i think that’s just a result my wishes.

I have a few friends, and i love them all. But she is different. She makes me feel like life is really worth living. Like i actually found someone that could feel and understand my love. She’s free as a bird, and no mather how hard people try to lock her down, she’ll always find her way up to the skies.

We’re both that free, and we both love the world. That’s what i think.

Sometimes i feel some love coming out of her to me. Sometimes it actually seems that we could be happy together, and those are the times when i fly up to the sky. But i guess i’ll eventually just crash into the ground, because all of this is nothing but an illusion. Loving her is not going to make her love me back.

The love spirit

It comes and goes,
That love spirit.
It’s shiny, attractive.
Takes smiles out of you.

Once it leaves it hurts,
So i hate only thinking,
That it will never come again.
But it always returns.

Where is it from?
Does it shine for me?
Is it real at all?
I just don’t know.

Maybe i created it.
Maybe it’s a ghost.
But dam it’s so wonderful.
How could i create that?

I can’t live like this.
At least not forever.
Guess i’ll leave when i can,
And see if it comes back,
If it comes after me.

To tell me: I love you

I can’t keep living a dream anymore. Dam, I need to help someone. I need to see someone happy. That’s the only way i could smile today. I knew you would be kind to me, my destiny. You sent me such a sweet little angel. I know I’ll never touch it, but that don’t stop me from wanting to. Your kindness sometimes seems like hatred…

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